Will you be that voice?
I`ve spent a lot of my life incarcerated in one form or another.
I am 33 years old and spent twelve of the past eighteen years in the Texas prison System.
Do I regret a lot of the things I`ve done?
Ofcourse I do, but I also believe that my past experience made me who I am today. Without those experiences, I would`t be the person I am.
I´ve been in some of the more notorious prisons in Texas.
I`ve seen the violence and anger of people who have no hope.
Most people in here stop trying and just give up looking forward to life outside of the fence.
The conditions here have gotten better over the years, the older prisons don`t have air-conditioning and thats one of the hardest things to physically overcome.
Most of us have burned bridges and have little or no support from the outside.
Without the support, the conditions worsen. They give us a couple very small bars of soap and toothpowder, other than that, we do without.
We have to buy a fan, deodorant, shampoo and all the other necessary items to get halfway comfortable.
Emotionally, this place is draining and overwhelming. Loneliness is the biggest obstacle. You can`t show weaknesses or get close to anyone.
What you tell someone in the morning, has a good chance of being spread all over the unit by that evening.
Most people are withdrawn and keep everything bottled up.
Everyone has gotten called to the Chaplans`office (or know someone who has) because a family member is in the hospital or died. You have to get the tears out in private.
If people saw you shed a tear, they`d pounce on you and take advantage of that "weakness". It doesn`t matter to those predators if it was your grandparent, mother or child. They see an opening and squeeze into it.
I´ve had to turn the other way while people were beaten, because it wasn`t any of my business.
Even if you aren`t a racist, prisons are segregated.
I came in when I was 16 years old, being white, young and cocky taught me a lot. I had to grow cold really quick.
I found my place, luckily. I didn`t have to join any of the gangs. But a lot of people in my place would have been sucked in for protection.
Like I`ve said, things have gotten better over the years, but we`ve got a Long way to go.
People get out and forget the conditions they were subjected to, they forget their cellie, they forget the food.
We need people dedicated to see it through untill the end.
I`m quitly too, I forgot the people I left inside.
things can change, it just takes a voice to get started.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Will you be that voice?
I`d like to have someone to write who has a relationship with God and will write about what they`ve learned and the experiences they`ve gone through. I don`t expect to fall in love with anybody from here. But I`d like to have a younger woman, preferrably with some of my interests ( Family, Country things, Harley`s and similar), educated, good looking is a plus and not afraid to voice opinions. I`d prefer someone in the Texas area and one day might visit. I don`t care about getting money from anybody. That`s the ideal Person.
PO Box 10069
Liberty, TX 77575